Big Brother

Kayden has a new role! On Saturday when daddy and I brought home Brecken to meet you, you were very excited! B/c of the swine flu kiddos under 14 are not allowed in any of the valley hospitals so you couldn't come meet him at the hospital. That made me pretty sad but I was that much more motivated to get out of there in 24 hours so that I could introduce you guys to eachother. When we got home you and Grandma were waiting outside by the curb for us. When I got out of the car the first thing you did was look at my belly and you said "My baby came out mama". I could tell in your eyes that you were having lots of emotions go through your little body that you couldn't totally process. You looked excited, scared, nervous and confused all at once. You were somewhere between smiling and crying and my heart broke for you. I know Brecken is an amazing gift to you and in time you will realize how wonderful it is to have siblings, but in that moment when you realized that the baby we had been talking about for months was real and going to invade your little universe I wanted to cry for you. And at that moment when you were so confused about how you felt you were still so naive to just HOW much your life was going to change.
So we got Brecken out of the carseat and you wanted to hold him right away. We put you in the rocking chair with a pillow and gave you the baby. You touched his cheek and had a huge smile while you were holding him. You didn't want to go trick or treating that night (it was Halloween), you just wanted to stay home w/ your baby. But we put your monkey costume on you and you walked to a couple houses but then you wanted to come right back home to your baby. That night you didn't want to go to sleep or leave our sides.
Now 10 days later you still love your baby. You like to watch him and touch him and give him kisses and if he's crying you come running! You love helping us change his diaper and give him a bath. You seem 100% fine with him, but you do get sad at times about the attention that he takes from you. It's not the baby so much that bothers you, just that you have to share your mommy and daddy with him. Nursing takes alot of time with a newborn and that is kind of hard for you too, you'll say "no nurse baby mama" or "baby all done!". Since Brecken has come home you've had a little difficulty sleeping at night and you have had some episodes where you aren't yourself but overall you've done great with the big transition! I couldn't be prouder of you!

I love to watch you watch him and give him kisses and I know that as he gets bigger and more active you 2 will grow closer and closer! I'm so proud of you for being a great big brother and learning to share your world with another person! You are doing a great job and you amaze me everyday little man!